What is it like to be asexual? →
Well, this was a nice surprise to see featured on the BBC homepage.
Asexuality has been the subject of very few scientific studies which has led to speculation about why some people feel no sexual attraction.
“There are people who definitely view it as a disorder and are like ‘oh if we give you these pills we can fix it’. Or people who ask you ‘have you had your hormones checked’, as though that’s the obvious solution,” says Jenni.
“And then you get people who go one step worse, and I have been asked before if I had been molested as a child, which is not an appropriate question to ask somebody to be honest, and also I haven’t been. It was the assumption that ‘hey you have something wrong with you, clearly you were molested as a child’ is just such a terrible attitude to have.”
Hmm…that was my mom’s first reaction. We were on the phone, the conversation took a weird turn from how my day went to relationships or sex or something. I told her aces exist, and all through my past and up to the present, I can really relate to that. And her first reaction was to ask if it was because of this whole big medical thing that dealt with my girly parts really screwed up my middle/high school experience.And then she proceed to tell me that she hopes I one day will understand what a good thing sex can be.
I…
….what.
Oh, god, I’m so sorry! That’s really…ugh. You keep proving her wrong, girl.
Exactly! I’ve never understood that preference for kids that HAVE to have your genes.
kinda why i have a love/hate relationship with Once Upon a TimeAlthough, despite adoring kids, I couldn’t see that happening any time soon. Really. haha
AND THAT’S THE PLAN. hahaha
Seriously. I agree completely with all of this. Em, you actually stating your affiliation with being asexual got me curious as to what it is, and the more I learn from you and other sources, the more strongly I feel that it fits me. I look at what my family’s reactions to my stances on relationships have been in the past, and its exactly like your moms. I’ve had many people tell me I’ll ‘change my mind later’ or that its ‘just a phase’ or its because “Well you’re a career woman, Hayden.” To me this serves to show that people are generally not comfortable with it. I even had my brother flat out ask if I was gay. Like. What.
Because people aren’t understanding/comfortable, they fill in the blank with the most logical explanation- health conditions, life plan/career minded, phase, whatever.
Its ridiculous, especially since this is something I’ve felt my entire life. 22 years is a long time for a ‘phase’.
*high fives* And yet ANOTHER way we’re alike! Have to admit- this doesn’t surprise me really hahaha
Although, if you think of it, it’s pretty odd how uncomfortable our society is with the idea of someone not wanting sex. Makes me wonder if our society has gone a little too far in it’s obsession with it.
